Gratitude.

After my previous post, I felt a little overwhelmed. (Let's be honest...I still do) I've been thinking a lot lately about blessings in my life. Sometimes it takes just a few seconds with someone who is doing worse than you before you can appreciate your own position in life. Growing up, I sometimes felt like I'd been shafted because other people had so much more. Oh how ignorant I was. I've spent a little time reflecting, and I thought I'd publicly thank some people, and write down a few other things that I'm grateful for. If I missed you, don't worry; I feel that there will be more posts like this down the road. (Warning: this will potentially be very long) Here goes...
I'm thankful for...

1. My testimony of the Savior. There have been times in my life when things are shaken, when I haven't understood how certain aspects of the gospel fit together, or how I fit into this puzzle that we call life. Even in those times when I questioned everything that I know and hold dearly now, my testimony of the Savior has never wavered. I have always known that He is there for me, and He has carried me through some of my very darkest days and cried with me through the longest nights.

2. My testimony of the Gospel. This did not come as easily for me as it did for others. I like to consider myself an intellectual, and usually this is a positive thing. However, there are some things that simply cannot be reasoned out and must be taken on faith. It breaks my heart that I spent so much time trying to pin down some hard evidence, something concrete. I wasted years of my life searching for something that has always been right in front of my face. I am so lucky for the tender mercies of the Lord that have pulled me through those times of doubt and allowed me to get to the place I am now, a place of peace.

3. My family. I'll get to specifics on this one later...

4. A nice apartment. The other day, I went over to my friends apartment. I could tell that they had done the very best that they could with it, but it smelled like urine, and could at best be described as a hovel. I have my own room with a warm heater and ample space to accomplish all the things that I need to in comfort.

5. A job that I love.

6. A sound mind.

7. The ability to learn

8. An education

9. Friends. In my life, I've been blessed with some incredible friends.

10. Parents who love me. I'm sure that I was not an easy child to love. They have stood by me and reached down to lift me up when I couldn't figure out which way to go. They are so generous and have bailed me out more times than I deserve. I love them so much and I am so glad that they were the ones to raise me to be the person that I turned out to be.

11. Stephenie Braden has been my best friend since the 4th grade. We have been through so much in our friendship, but I gotta tell you, we have brought each other through so much. She never ceases to amaze me. We have an awesome relationship in which I can tell her when she's being retarded and she can turn around and tell me that I'm being a pain in the butt. It's SO hard to find that in a friend, and I'm lucky to have her.

12. Creativity.

13. Books. I love books so much.

14. Scriptures

15. Food

16. Non-insane roommates

17. Cooking skills. (I take after my maja.)

18. Citizenship in this country

19. A plan for my life. This took me a lot longer than it should have, but I'm not sure that I would go back and change my choices if I could. I feel like the struggle to get to a place where I know that I'm going to love what I do makes me SO happy.

20. The gift to teach with the spirit

21. A computer

22. The fact that I've always had employment to meet my needs.

23. Tithing

24. Priesthood

25. Honesty

26. Callings

27. Blanche & Cleo

28. Mistakes to learn from.

29. Extended family. I never see them (which is mostly my fault) but I know that if I ever needed anything, they'd all be here in a second.

30. Washington Water

31. Gym boy, BG, SB, LP, TC, CB, TW, even dev. I've learned so much from all of these boys ranging from my first crush to a potential spouse. I've learned that butterflies sometimes bring pain, you can get over almost anything, I am a lot tougher than I thought, and that when the right one finally meanders his little self into my life, I'll appreciate him a million and a half times more than I ever could have otherwise.

32. New friends.

33. Forgiveness. Heaven knows that I've screwed things up enough times. Also, I'm grateful for the weight that is taken off when you just let something go.

Okay...I'm going to have to work on this list later...it's after one AM.

Good Night.